Friday, October 29, 2010

Chaplains. . . Warn about repeal of DADT. . .

Retired Military chaplains warn against repeal of DADT. . . . . They complain they do not have enough chaplains now.  Hmmm. . . .what's it going to be. . . .?

So, what is next?  Will the military  ---- does it now ? ---- provide kosher food for observant Jews?
What about Muslim dietary laws?   What about 'witches'?  etc

justin. . . .
trying to be respectful of  diversity. . . . .

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Gay Marriage

G'day JustinO,

 Guess what? Here we are with gays demanding equal rights with marriage while there's a straight couple demanding to be civil partners... but they can't because they're straight


School Official Wants Gays Dead

Arkansas school board member Clint McCance believes "queers" and "fags" should kill themselves — that is, if they don't get AIDS and die first.

By Neal Broverman (Source) from The Advocate

While schools across the country are taking action against bullying and suicide, a board member of an Arkansas school district is using his Facebook page to encourage "queers" and "fags" to kill themselves.

Clint McCance is a board member in the Midland school district in northern Arkansas. Responding to a call to wear purple last Wednesday to support LGBT youth, McCance wrote the following message on his Facebook page: "Seriously they want me to wear purple because five queers killed themselves. The only way im wearin it for them is if they all commit suicide. I cant believe the people of this world have gotten this stupid. We are honoring the fact that they sinned and killed thereselves because of their sin. REALLY PEOPLE."

Initially, six people "liked" McCance's message. He also received supportive comments, though some challenged his statement. A commenter wrote, "Because hatred is always right." That led McCance to write, "No because being a fag doesn't give you the right to ruin the rest of our lives. If you get easily offended by being called a fag then dont tell anyone you are a fag. Keep that shit to yourself. I dont care how people decide to live their lives. They dont bother me if they keep it to thereselves. It pisses me off though that we make a special purple fag day for them. I like that fags cant procreate. I also enjoy the fact that they often give each other aids and die. If you arent against it, you might as well be for it."


McCance responded with, "I would disown my kids if they were gay. They will not be welcome at my home or in my vicinity. I will absolutely run them off. Of course my kids will know better. My kids will have solid christian beliefs. See it infects everyone."

It's not clear if McCance has taken down the thread, since his Facebook page is private — the messages were made available to The Advocate via a forwarded screen capture. The superintendent of the Midland school district was unavailable and a phone call to the principal of the Midland High School was not returned. There was no response to e-mails to the superintendent and to the secretary of the Midland school board.
"Clint McCance has put a face on the hate that devastates our young people," says Human Rights Campaign president Joe Solmonese. "McCance shouldn't be allowed near children, let alone managing their education. We call for his immediate resignation from the school board."

Boundaries. . .. part 2.

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 09:53 PM PDT
Pgt_6yhxx Boundary Violations In Gay Relationships - We’ve talked about self-oriented boundary violations like straying from your diet or cheating on a test. Violations in your relationship with your partner can be particularly damaging, however, as they can diminish your trust in each other and cause significant conflicts and emotional distance that can tear down the foundation of commitment you’ve built. Again, it’s human to stray from our boundaries at times, but when it becomes pervasive and isn’t talked about with your partner to try and remedy it, serious consequences can arise.
Here are some examples of common boundary violations in relationships to give you a better idea of what we’re talking about:
  • You drink too much at the bar with your friends and flirt with all the men near you while your partner is away on business
  • Your partner pressures you to experiment with sexual practices you’re not comfortable with
  • You don’t stick up for your partner when your family badmouths him
  • Your partner makes other things, like work or his hobbies, more of a priority than spending quality time with you
  • You don’t voice your opinions about the way you would like things to function in your relationship and then harbor feelings of resentment toward your partner when he makes all the decisions
  • Your partner strays from your monogamous relationship by cheating with someone he met on the Internet
  • Negativity, jealousy, passive-aggressiveness, lying, withdrawal, blaming…these are also “red flags”
And the list goes on and on! It is only a violation if either of you behave in a way that contradicts the relationship vision or mission that the two of you should have and should continue to be co-creating from the inception of your partnership. Communication of your expectations and values is critical from the very beginning of your relationship and should continue to be re-visited periodically to ensure you both are still “on the same page”. Your relationship and the players involved in it will grow and change, which is a normal part of your maturation, and you’ll need to be open to this and make revisions to your original “contract” as necessary.
Tips For Boundary-Setting Success
  • As an individual, determine whether you struggle with maintaining healthy boundaries in your relationships and life in general. Difficulties with boundaries can come from many sources, including: being raised in a dysfunctional family where unhealthy boundaries were modeled, low self-esteem, lack of individual identity and codependency, poor assertiveness and social skills, being in an abusive or toxic relationship, being easily guilt-prone, having addictions of any kind, having power/control issues, getting a sense of validation for catering to a relationship partner, etc. Try to identify where your struggles with boundaries originate and keep track of what triggers your self-sabotaging behavior. Work aggressively at overcoming these personal hurdles to promote a more solid and confident sense of self.
  • Take a class on assertiveness training or get some counseling to help you build skills in identifying your needs and feelings and how to directly express them without guilt or qualification.
  • As a couple, plot out a relationship mission statement that specifies your values and expectations for behavioral conduct as individuals and as a couple. This becomes your “relationship contract” that will give you a structure by which to live your life with integrity and stability. Introduce spontaneity and novelty into your relationship from time to time so you don’t feel like you’re living according to a policies and procedures manual and to keep the spark alive.
  • Make sure that you both define your particular boundaries around money, household management and domestics/division of labor, sex, monogamy vs. non-monogamy, parenting roles (if applicable), work, friends, family, health, spirituality, the way anger is dealt with, how you spend your time, etc. It may seem like a lot of material to cover, but the more that’s communicated will lessen the opportunity for surprise violations to occur in the future. It’s a great way to learn more about each other too and create further growth as a couple.
  • Realize that you and your guy will not always see eye-to-eye on things. It will be important to recognize and appreciate your differences and have systems in place to manage disagreements (eg. fair-fight rules, taking Time-Outs when anger gets unproductive, following the problem-solving process for reaching win/win solutions, practicing forgiveness and compromise, etc.). Communication is key of course! Make sure you’re both well adept in the fine art of active listening to help pave the way toward resolution.
  • Boundaries protect your relationship from outside forces as well. Should family or friends try to come between you, even if well-intentioned, always stand by your man and reinforce your commitment to each other. Don’t enable other peoples’ efforts to force their viewpoints and projections onto your relationship.
Conclusion - So whether you’re single and looking for Mr. Right or you’ve already found him, recognize the profound importance boundaries have on your well-being and quality of life. Without them, you’re left in a vulnerable position and can make poor choices that could adversely affect the course of your life. Knowing yourself and standing up for what you believe in can empower you to enjoy life to the fullest and accomplish great things in your relationships.

© 2007 Brian L Rzepczynski
Brian Rzepczynski, Certified Personal Life Coach, is The Gay Love Coach: "I work with gay men who are ready to create a roadmap that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right." To sign up for the FREE Gay Love Coach Newsletter filled with dating and relationship tips and skills for gay singles and couples, as well as to check out current coaching groups, programs, teleclasses, and the self-help book he co-authored, "A Guide to Getting It: Purpose & Passion," please visit Thank you!

~~~~~THANKS to MICHAEL from

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Boundaries. . . .aka Borders. . .

You'll Never Be Lonely
 If You Love The Person
 You're Alone With

Posted: 26 Oct 2010 01:20 AM PDT
ASI3500f9624f68009a58d563078b8dbdda0_full Have you ever skipped going to the health club one day because you just absolutely had no motivation to get all sweaty and tired?Or what about gorging on a half-gallon of ice cream to cope with your stress? Ever leave the mall wondering what the heck you were thinking maxing out your credit card? Do you work more hours at your job than need be? These are situations where a boundary violation of the self has occurred and we’ve all been there.

Boundaries are the limits we set around ourselves to keep safe, centered, and accountable. They are usually drawn from our values and they define who we are and what we will and won’t accept in our lives to keep our integrity and well-being intact. The more aligned our behavior is with our defined boundaries, the more balance and harmony we tend to experience in our lives.

When we act outside the confines of our boundaries, our self-esteem can take a hit and we actually can create a whole host of other stressors that will disrupt us and leave us feeling badly and out-of-integrity. It is human nature to stumble outside our boundaries from time to time, but when it becomes a way of life, underlying issues may be at play that will require some attention and intervention to avoid ongoing conflicts in one’s life.

Not only do we have self-imposed boundaries, but boundaries also pertain to our relationships. A healthy relationship is comprised of two men with a solid sense of self and identity. Boundaries help protect the partners of a couple from abuse or outside influences of others. They help create a sense of security in the partnership, allowing safe communication of needs and feelings between the partners that helps to solidify a positive connection and intimacy. Boundaries help cement what is deemed appropriate and inappropriate conduct both within and outside the context of being a couple and help to define who you are and what you stand for as life partners.

Boundaries & Relationship Types - Here’s an illustration as to why boundaries are important to your relationship. Take out a piece of paper. At the top of the page, draw two circles on opposite sides of the page. This represents the type of relationship where the couple identifies themselves as a pair, however they have little connection with each other and live parallel lives with minimal contact, sharing, or interaction that would support an intimate commitment. This relationship exhibits boundaries that are too strong to allow closeness and which there’s too much separateness and division between the two men. Little will grow from this except more of a “roommate feeling” and dissension. This style has too much individual identity.

In the middle of the page, draw two circles with one on top of the other. This relationship type is called enmeshed, where the couple is practically one whole. You are your partner; you live and breathe your partner with very little independence and individuality. You are merged together so completely that you lose your sense of self because you’re so fused and any perceived threat that exists to your relationship is thought of as devastating. The problem with this relationship style is that partners can feel suffocated and overly-dependent on each other; controlling behaviors are not uncommon and you can feel restricted and trapped. This style has too much couple identity.

At the bottom of the page, draw two circles that are mildly intertwined at the sides. This is a healthy relationship where the partners are slightly merged. There is a healthy balance of separateness and togetherness. The couple is flexible, honoring their uniqueness as individuals and their shared connection as partners. Because of this balance, “fresh air” is constantly being breathed into the relationship, revitalizing it and making it exciting, unlike the staleness of the former relationship type where everything is about the other person. This style works because the boundaries aren’t too rigid or loose and they take into account that healthy relationships have both individual and couple identities. This is what you want to shoot for!

(Part Two  - Tomorrow)
Brian Rzepczynski, Certified Personal Life Coach, is The Gay Love Coach: "I work with gay men who are ready to create a roadmap that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right." To sign up for the FREE Gay Love Coach Newsletter filled with dating and relationship tips and skills for gay singles and couples, as well as to check out current coaching groups, programs, teleclasses, and the self-help book he co-authored, "A Guide to Getting It: Purpose & Passion," please visit Thank you!

Thanks again, Michael.  These articles from  are much appreciated.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Present NOW

In view of our conversations the last few days, may I offer a bit of wisdom  (sophia) for your consideration?

Posted: 25 Oct 2010 09:57 
GAYTWOGETHER.COM - Quotes & Quips"Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand-and melting like a snowflake." - Marie Beyon Ray

Nothing like the present moment. . . .GRAB IT. . . .

Monday, October 25, 2010

WHEN. . first sex. . .. . ? -- part 2

Posted: 25 Oct 2010 04:07 AM PDT
GAYTWOGETHERpgtww033109 The Sexual Floodgates Are Opening! - So you and Mr. Wonderful are now at the stage where the chemistry is bubbling over and you can’t keep your hands off each other. You’ve gone out at least several times and the compatibility you share seems to be indicating a “green light.” Before racing off to the bedroom (or other creative carnal lovemaking spot!), ask yourself these questions to avoid getting hurt and to make sure this is the right time for you to get naked:
• Why do we want to have sex now? What are our motives?

• Do I feel physically and emotionally safe with him? Am I able to be vulnerable with him with my body and emotions?

• Do I feel cared about by him? Does he show genuine interest and curiosity about me in other areas of my life other than sex? Does he respond to me non-sexually?

• Am I able to be myself freely around him? Do I feel good about myself when I’m around him? Do I like the man that he is from what I’ve learned about him so far?

• Are we able to communicate openly with each other? Have we each engaged in enough self-disclosure to feel comfortable about each other? Have we been able to express affection to each other thus far?

• Does he demonstrate dependability and loyalty? Do I feel like a priority? Do we have mutual respect and support? 

Additional Tips Before Taking The Plunge: • Make sure you’ve talked about your sexual histories and have had discussions about sexually transmitted diseases, safe sex, and beliefs about monogamy vs. nonmonogamy. While this may seem like it’ll take away some of the excitement, it doesn’t necessarily have to do that. Make the discussion part of the “erotic foreplay” and explore your sexual values, attitudes, preferences, and fantasies together to heighten the intimacy and get to know each other more intensely. Make it part of the “turn-on” and “build-up.”

• It may be helpful to communicate to dating prospects something to the effect of “I’m very attracted to you but I don’t have sex until I really know someone.” A frank, up-front assertive statement such as this will certainly weed out men who potentially match your vision vs. those who don’t. You may get lots of men who “abandon ship”, but they weren’t meant to be and now lots of time and energy has been saved for you to continue your quest. Remember, it’s quality, not quantity.

• When you’re in the “waiting phase” and holding off from sex initially, continually create “allure” and intrigue to keep your guy aware that you’re still interested and find him attractive with respectful flirting. A lot of gay men have been conditioned to equate “no sex” with rejection and could be sensitive to “sexual fasting”, so give him lots of “positive strokes” to keep the spark going without playing games.

• While the argument could be made that having sex right away can help bring to light whether you’re sexually compatible, keep in mind that it all comes down to your personal requirements and what you deem most important. Also remember that sex gets hotter the longer a couple is together (practice makes perfect!) and that sex tends to be more passionate and fulfilling when a foundation of emotional intimacy has already been developed.

• Finally, no matter how much prep-work you’ve laid out to be a successful dater, there will be times when you’ll make a mistake, have a slip of poor judgment, or the other guy will bail for no apparent reason. Be kind to yourself and remember you’re human. Take ownership for where you went wrong and get back on your dating plan. You have no control over how the other guy behaves. Be mindful too that sex is a loaded issue for a lot of people and unresolved intimacy issues is a big culprit for seemingly good dating prospects bolting out of nowhere shortly after a sexual relationship begins. Protect your heart, be patient, and never give up hope that your Mr. Right is out there—the timing just hasn’t been right yet.

Conclusion:  Sex means different things to different men. As a gay man searching for a life partner, introducing sex into a dating relationship takes faith and trust. There is no right time necessarily to be intimate, but realizing that sex and relationships have completely different mindsets with different attitudes and behaviors can better help you decide where and when your sexual first with Mr. Wonderful fits best into the timeline of your vision for a long-term relationship.
Stay true to your values and remember that it’s not a numbers game—it’s about being successful with the right guy..Mr. Right!© 2006 Brian L. Rzepczynski

Brian Rzepczynski, Certified Personal Life Coach, is The Gay Love Coach: “I work with gay men who are ready to create a road map that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right.” To sign up for the FREE Gay Love Coach Newsletter filled with dating and relationship tips and skills for gay singles and couples, as well as to check out current coaching groups, programs, and teleclasses, please visit

Thanks to MICHAEL at

Saturday, October 23, 2010

"It Gets Better" . . . . from Provincetiown, MA

Hello ALL y'ALL. . . .

Here are some messages from people in Provincetown to our younger gay sisters and brothers. . .nice people. . .;-)

Friday, October 22, 2010

When Sex?. . .. . part 1

Posted: 22 Oct 2010 04:08 AM PDT
GAYTWOGETHERpgtww033109 Introduction - Question: At what point does a dating relationship turn sexual if you’re looking for a lasting relationship?
The reader posing this question goes on to say that in his experience, sex too soon in a dating relationship seemed to make the connection all about sex, while waiting for an extended period of time resulted in men perceiving him as a “tease” or being uninterested in them for anything but just friendship.

So what’s a guy to do? When is the right time to have sex so as not to sabotage the development of a potentially healthy relationship with a compatible dating prospect? Well, the long and the short of it is that there is no right time! There’s no science or magic formula to negotiating the right time to be sexual to guarantee lasting success. There are no guarantees in relationships. What it boils down to is each individual’s readiness and comfort level with taking things to that next step and keeping the channels of communication open.

So while there’s no hardfast rule, this article will offer some tips and questions for reflection for you to decide when the time is right for you to take things to the “bedroom level.” Through this content, perhaps you will discover some factors that might promote the opportunity for success of a long-term relationship that you can integrate into your own dating plan and sexual decision-making practices.

Sex & Gay Dating:
Sex is obviously a very important part of a relationship. In gay dating, sex actually plays a vital developmental role in helping a man to explore his sexuality during the coming-out process and forming his identity as a gay man; it’s a healthy rite-of-passage. Sex plays other roles though in gay culture. Its purpose can be for:

• pure recreational fun
• tension release
• a thrill for conquest
• a rebellion against heterosexist norms
• an uncontrollable addiction
• a way to boost one’s self-esteem
• a mask for emotional problems
• a temporary cure for boredom or loneliness
• horniness gratification
• a vehicle for avoiding emotional intimacy…among others.

For you, as the serious dater seeking Mr. Right, your vision for the primary purpose of sex is as an expression of your feelings of adoration for one another, cementing a bond of closeness and connection as you begin to seal an identity as a couple with the intention of life-long commitment.

Your job is to adequately screen your dating partners to determine if their vision for sexuality and life aligns with yours. It’s when there’s a mismatch between these visions or differing motives from the purposes above that leads to relationships ending before they even got started when sex enters the picture early on.

Knowing Thyself:
Before you even begin your dating adventures, you must have a solid vision in place of what and who you’re looking for. What are your personal requirements, needs, and wants for a life partner and a relationship? What does dating mean to you and what does it look like? What are your sexual values and attitudes? The answers to these questions become your guide for detecting the “right” vs. the “wrong” types of guys you’re seeking.

Sex is so glamorized in our gay culture that the pressure to succumb to its powerful influences can be overwhelming. That’s why you must have a plan in place before you date so you can more readily “stick to your guns” and not be swayed by temptations or other forces. Knowing yourself and your values is key. Your beliefs about the role you want sex to play in your dating life will shape your behavior as such.

Meeting Mr. Wonderful…Now What?
It’s hard work creating your own vision, but then to assess another guy’s vision for compatibility is another feat that’s not easily accomplished in one or two dates. It’s a process. That’s why introducing sex too early into a dating relationship can be sabotaging because the relationship gets defined around sex before a foundation of trust and intimacy has been established.

This isn’t to say that meaningful relationships can’t evolve from a sex-based affiliation, but in a lot of cases premature sex can send the wrong message or tone that then permeates the entire relationship—and it can be irreversible. Not to mention determining your new guy’s sexual values and motives discussed earlier may not be so easily detectable in the early stages of dating.

Most gay dating experts agree that a wise approach for those seeking long-term relationships is to hold off on sex for at least 3-4 dates with a man. This allows time for a friendship to develop, to screen each other to the best you can for “goodness-of-fit”, and lets the relationship be defined around common interests, goals, and mature companionship—enduring qualities that highlight successful relationships.

Sex alone is not sufficient to carry a lasting partnership. You’ll also be able to tell in a lot of cases whether the man is genuinely interested in you or if he’s solely after sex or gratification of other motives. Once you have sex, it changes the dynamics, so it’s important to pace the relationship.
( Part Two - Monday )
© 2006 Brian L. Rzepczynski

Brian Rzepczynski, Certified Personal Life Coach, is The Gay Love Coach: “I work with gay men who are ready to create a road map that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right.” To sign up for the FREE Gay Love Coach Newsletter filled with dating and relationship tips and skills for gay singles and couples, as well as to check out current coaching groups, programs, and teleclasses, please visit

~~~~THANKS again to Michael/

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Pentagon reworking Rules for DADT. . .back in force. . .. !

YES SIR!   The military is working out New RULES for DADT. . . ..likely ready at the end of today.

Yepper, you got it right !   LOL

THERE ARE OVER 8K reader comments.  Check 'em out if you wonder what / how the NON-GAYS.
the "gay challenged" think of US.   Most are not flattering.  Some are downriught SCARY !!  I wouldn't want to get caught in the shower room with  them!  Too risky.  Or out on patrol with a group of rednecks!

They don't trust me. . .I am gay. . .well, works the same way:  I do not trust them.


Y'ever see  movie  SOLDIER'S GIRL ?  It will rip your heart out !

Videos for movie Soldier's Girl

Soldier Girl - The Polyphonic Spree - Soldier ...
5 min - Sep 13, 2008
Uploaded by giantrees
Soldier's Girl Trailer
1 min - Aug 22, 2006
Uploaded by Spooky87
soldier's Girl
112 min - May 5, 2009

Why US lawyers fight for law on gays Obama opposes

Paul Clement AP – In this photo provided by the Department of Justice, Paul Clement is seen in this photo, date unknown. …
WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama opposes the Pentagon's "don't ask, don't tell" policy on gays in the military, so why are Obama administration lawyers in court fighting to save it?
The answer is one that perhaps only a lawyer could love: There is a long tradition that the Justice Department defends laws adopted by Congress and signed by a president, regardless of whether the president in office likes them.
This practice cuts across party lines. And it has caused serious heartburn for more than one attorney general.
The tradition flows directly from the president's constitutional duty to take care that the laws are faithfully executed, says Paul Clement, who served four years in President George W. Bush's administration as solicitor general, the executive branch's top lawyer at the Supreme Court.
Otherwise, Clement says, the nation would be subjected to "the spectacle of the executive branch defending only laws it likes, with Congress intervening to defend others."
That is why solicitors general not only serve the president who nominated them but also have a special duty to Congress, "most notably, the vigorous defense of the statutes of this country against constitutional attack," Justice Elena Kagan testified to Congress in 2009 after Obama nominated her to be solicitor general. She joined the Supreme Court a year later.
On occasion, the Justice Department will even defend a law it knows is likely to be judged unconstitutional, said Seth Waxman, who served as President Bill Clinton's solicitor general.
Six federal judges had ruled against the Communications Decency Act, a 1996 law that made it a crime to make available to minors on the Internet material that was "indecent" or "patently offensive." Nevertheless, Waxman backed the law in an appeal to the Supreme Court. He lost there, but felt good about serving "our adversarial system of constitutional adjudication."
William French Smith, President Ronald Reagan's first attorney general, once said that defending congressional action that extended the ratification period for the proposed Equal Rights Amendment for women caused far and away his most uncomfortable moments in four years in office because of the irate calls he got from administration supporters — who staunchly opposed the ERA.
Obama's supporters have similarly criticized the administration for its legal efforts on behalf of "don't ask, don't tell," the law that bars gays from serving openly in the military, even after U.S. District Judge Virginia Phillips in Riverside, Calif., ordered the military to immediately suspend and discontinue any investigation or other proceeding to dismiss gay service members under the law.
Indeed, Justice lawyers delayed their response to Phillips because the White House weighed in on the matter, according to a government official with knowledge of the situation. A couple of White House lawyers did not want to seek a court order that would temporarily suspend the judge's ruling, this person said, speaking on condition of anonymity to discuss the administration's internal deliberations. Failing to challenge the ruling would have had the effect of ending the policy.
Obama says he supports repeal of "don't ask, don't tell" but only after careful review and an act of Congress.
Ultimately, the government did ask Phillips to suspend her ruling pending the government's appeal.
After Phillips refused, the administration asked the federal appeals court in San Francisco to freeze her ruling temporarily, which it did late Wednesday. Justice lawyers argued that while appeals were pending, abruptly ending "don't ask, don't tell" and immediately allowing openly gay service members could harm troop morale and unit cohesion when the military is fighting two wars.
On rare occasions, Justice officials conclude there is no reasonable argument that can be made in defense of a federal law.
Clement recalled two instances during his tenure. One posed free speech problems, because it sought to prevent recipients of federal transportation money from running ads favoring legalization of some drugs. The other was an obscure 1800s statute dealing with licensing of salvage operations.
When George H.W. Bush was president, he vetoed the Cable Television Act of 1992 in the belief that certain provisions were unconstitutional. The bill became law when Congress overrode Bush's veto.
Cable operators challenged the law in court, and Bush's Justice Department said it would not defend what the president had vetoed.
But then Clinton was elected. He reversed course and sent Justice lawyers into court on behalf of the law. The Supreme Court eventually upheld it.
Follow Yahoo! News on , become a fan on

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Purple Day. . .a good day

This has been an interesting day. . ...well, aren't all days interesting?  ;-)  When I drove on campus pass one of the dorms my eyes caught sight of a Rainbow Flag out one of the windows.   hmmmm  Interesting.  For purple I have this great scarf. . . bright purple. . .ya can't miss it.  So I decided to set or copy a fashion trend I noticed one of these years. . . .LOL  It was just there, hanging down.  You think I made a statement?. .hahahaaa

In my first class at 11 a.m. I casually noted attendance . . . playing cool , , ,as i sized them up.  Quick tally I'd say about 3/4 had some purple, of some shade and location  [ I think all the shades of purple Bannister mentioned in his post were in evidence. ]  One girl had this huge purple pom-pom she was trying to keep attached to her hair!   Good luck, lady!  It proved to be quite a distraction and she removed it with a flourish.
One guy made a point of showing me his purple socks which lit up the aisle.  hahaaaa  Anyway we chatted and laughed together and then got down to work.

We were talking about factors which go into shaping our personalities.. . .One of the guys, sitting center stage right, raised his hand to ask a question.  So I said "Yes. . .Mr. Brack. . ."  For formal occasions I often call a student by his/her formal name.  He got kinda red and then said, as cooly as possible "Mr. O'Shea, were you always gay?"  There was an intake of breath from the group.  I wasn't / they weren't expecting that personal a question.  . . .I said "Now, Mr Brack, what makes you think I am gay?"  Silence.  Then Paul kinda grinned and said "Because, Mr O'Shea, you told us so!"  That broke the ice; we all laughed. . . some of it was a bit of nervous laughter. . . I scratched my head "I did?  . . . .Was I drunk?"  More laughter.  It wasn't and has never been a hostile environment so I was comfortable and thought to myself. . . "AHaaaaa. . .this gives me an opening I've been waiting for!  I can talk about being gay, how it "happens" and how being gay fits into my personality formation...", . . .and away we went.

It couldn't have worked better if I had set Paul up myself. . .so Mr Brack. . Paul, that is. . .asked "How did you know you are gay. . . .and when. . . ?"  And away we went. . . .it was fantabulous. . . hahahaha. . . This was an opportunity I wasn't going to lose. . . ..and, it happened all so innocently. . .coming naturally from wearing something PURPLE PURPLE to remember the gay kids all over who are bullied, and dont quite handle it, sadly. . . and about the prejudice springing from fear about being gay.

One of the jocks said, very honestly, he wanted to believe all this tolerance and acceptance, etc. but sometimes felt that gays in the military would "break down discipline" etc. . We've all heard/read that line of thinking.  He wasn't hostile. . . .but  a part of me. . .very briefly wanted to counter this by saying "Well, first of all , Sonny, the whole world is not after or interested in your ass. . . or any other part of your gorgeous anatomy". . . .It would have been real comedy. . .and also very cruel. . . .and I would have lost them. . .totally.  . . and betrayed the whole reason for Purple Day.  I would never do that to anyone. . . .but I do have some stray thoughts now and then. . . and some not quite noble, either.  hahahaaa

Anyway, it was an excellent day.  Guess what!  My after lunch 1 p.m. had heard about the morning class work, and wanted to do the same.  So, of course, we did.  They had tons of questions and got very involved.
A good DAY !

The photo above is the yellow bush outside the den window here at home. . .The angle and brightness of the sun makes it look like Spring. . .there is a softness to it all we don't associate with Fall.  I spent some time gazing at it. . . .thinking things over. . . .Yellow is one of my favorite colors, especially the Spring yellows. .

SO. .  ..away we go .. . always forward and upward. . . .. why not?  ;-)



Wear Purple to Remind

Wear Purple For The Six Gay Teenage Boys Who Committed Suicide.
Share · Public Event
Wednesday, October 20 · 12:00am - 11:30pm


Created By

Not long ago 6 American teenage boys committed suicide. Why? These teens were discriminated because of their sexuality. They were all gay. On the 20th of October which is Spirit Day, it is a plea worldwide from the families and friend of these six boys to wear purple in remembrance and in protest of the way the homosexual community are being treated. So please, wherever you are work or school, or even just sitting at home wear purple.
Support Gay rights.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

GOOD!!!! "Slap 'em back!" The 18yo better watch his ass!

3 teens charged in anti-gay attack in suburban NY

MINEOLA, N.Y. – Three teenagers beat and slapped a younger boy during bus rides to and from school this week because they suspected he was gay, and two of them taunted him about it, police on New York's Long Island said Thursday..

David Spencer, 18, and Roy Wilson, 16, were arraigned Thursday in Nassau County Court in Hempstead. Bail was set at $1,000 for Spencer and $500 for Wilson. They were represented by attorneys from Legal Aid, which does not comment on pending cases. A third co-defendant, 16-year-old Chase Morrison, will be arraigned Friday; the name of his attorney was not immediately available

Morrison and Spencer were charged by police with felony assault and aggravated harassment, the latter charge stemming from alleged anti-gay epithets uttered during the attacks, police said. Wilson was charged only with assault because police said there was no evidence that he made any anti-gay slurs.
Police said the remarks about the victim's sexual orientation were made after school Tuesday afternoon and Wednesday morning. The three defendants and the 14-year-old victim, whom police did not identify, attend a regional trade school in Hicksville

The victim was "stomped and kicked" on his arms, legs and stomach during a bus ride home on Tuesday afternoon, Detective Lt. John MacEwen said. The next morning, Spencer and Morrison allegedly made "disparaging remarks to the victim regarding his sexual orientation," and slapped him in the head and face. The boy told school officials Wednesday about the encounter and police arrested the older teens later that day.
"We felt this was bias-related," MacEwen told reporters Thursday.

The arrests come just days after 10 men were charged in the Bronx with what New York City officials say was one of the worst cases of anti-gay violence in recent memory. Police say a group of gang members beat and sodomized a 17-year-old recruit because they thought he was gay. Another 17-year-old also thought to be gay was attacked, and a 30-year-old and his brother were beaten as well.

Military recruiters told to accept gay applicants

Court orders US to stop enforcing gay military ban AFP/Getty Images/File – A protester rallying to demand the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy be repealed in March …
WASHINGTON – A Pentagon spokeswoman says recruiters have been told that they must accept gay applicants, following a federal court decision striking down the ban on gays serving openly in the military.
Spokeswoman Cynthia Smith said Tuesday that top-level guidance has been issued to recruiting commands informing them that the military's "don't ask, don't tell" rule has been suspended for now. Recruiters also have been told to inform potential recruits that the moratorium could be reversed at any point.
Last week, a federal judge ordered the military to stop enforcing the 1993 law banning openly gay service members. The Justice Department is appealing the decision and has asked for a temporary stay.

I attach some of the comments from readers.   I would not want to have to LIVE with people like these!
justin- - - -  --

  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    Jaspertheghost 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    According to Rasmussen polls (very right wing) and Gallop polls, 70% of Americans believe that gay men and women should be able to serve openly.
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    Harry Immigrant 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    Why is it so hard to get a comment posted here?
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    Mikel 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    Its going to be a shame when they go into battle and the queers are abandon in hostile territory. It will be then when these idiots running our goverment will learn that being politically correct is not a great idea. Homosexuality is wrong and unmoral. Thats why they have been found in the shadows of history.
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    X 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    Lets see how many take advantage of this new opportunity...
  • 1 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    1 users disliked this comment
    miner 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    i bet obama has this judge on his speed dial just another way for him to undermine our country
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    thomas 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    For all the complaining name calling. I don't see you at the recruiter office joining up. How self righteous and patriot we become when we don't have to serve. Gays have always been part of the military from day one. Not everyone is a flaming queen, most of them got more guts than you.
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    1 users disliked this comment
    GDC 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    Homosexuality IS a mental sickness and ALL homosexuals are mentally sick. They are UN-fit to serve in the Military.
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    enough allready 2 minutes ago Report Abuse
    The village people will be minus one sailor
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    Educated&Tired 3 minutes ago Report Abuse
    Why does no one ask what happens to a democracy when there is no discipline in the populace? Why do we let the courts trump popular choice?
  • 0 users liked this comment
    Vote for this comment
    Vote for this comment
    0 users disliked this comment
    P Nelson 3 minutes ago Report Abuse
    What a repulsive situation. No child of mine will ever serve in the U.S. military. The next time the Jews try to drag us into one of their wars, find some other suckers to fight it. I realize our military is made up of wimpy officers who try to appease Zionists, feminists, gays, and assorted kooks, but this is the last straw.

Post a Comment

Comment Guidelines
  1. 4000 characters