Sunday, April 25, 2010

JASON AND DEMARCO. . .SUNDAY MORNING MUSINGS

The notice I posted about Jason and deMarco roused some attention. . . quite a bit, for this group. . .who rather play their cards close to their chests. lol In ways they are a 'fantasy couple' -- what many gays dream about. . .young, good looking, boyishly cute, freely demonstrative and willing to share their experiences, strengths, hopes, struggles.. . . .and they sing 'spirituals'. . . ministering. . . Jason bringing his enthusiastic pentecostal background, having kept the good free worship styles, a lively faith, which saw him thru the mean fundamentalism which can cause a certain sharpness in reactionary converting from. . . DeMarco, with his defined Mediterranean roots, Sicilly or Italy likely, and the RC upbringing. A maturity they both show is their non-attacking of their religious roots. . .they incorporated them and moved along, grew. . ..

Their welcome into various church groups for music ministry is indicative of their maturing approach to faith expressions. Plus their work to finance the foundation they started. . . I think it is called Home. . .temporary shelter for young people-in-transition. . . likely young gays especially who've been thrown out, injured, adjusting and coping with their orientation, overcoming drugs and alcohol. . . ages 18 and up to getting settled. I note too they avoid the legal hastles of sheltering minors with all manner of external interventions and restrictions. I see this a good indication of not just preaching but also DOing. . ..faith in action.

An important area which makes me identify with them is their family background rooted in a faith tradition -- similar to my O'Shea-Bouvier roots -- where they were supported and nurtured and obviously not driven away. That in itself is an important issue we didn't have to fight against. . . the rest can be hard enough without family rejection added. In writing about this, I see again the blessing both Peter and I can share. . . .we have the similar early roots. . .and, all things considered, having worked thru the religious negatives, we are not angry Catholics. While we obviously reject the narrow harsh inaccurate views of the RCC regarding homosexuality, we came to the realization that these views are not at faith-center, but more a cultural hang-up. We can and do reject that but our attitude is far more open and inclusive.

I might add, too, Jason and deMarco (----and Peter and me ----) would never be invited to "minister" in/with a Catholic church group as 'teachers'. On the other hand since high school both Peter and I have served as lectors - reading the scriptures as part of the Mass service in our home parish. At school I am one of the ministers of Communion during Mass. . . .In some parishes because I am gay I would be asked to step down from either ministry.

Whoaaaaaa. . . hahahaaa. . ..did I get wound up this morning! I hope you do not find this burdensome.

justin

13 comments:

Jabacue said...

Justin, you have no need to apologize for what you write. This was well said and you got your point across.

Gary Kelly said...

Why should anyone assume that Jesus wasn't gay? He never married and had 12 best mates. Just thought I'd throw that into the ring.

As to relationships, my friend's dog died the other day. She was 14 and he's 15, so you can imagine how close they were. I got to thinking about kids and dogs, and how well they bond. No need for 'how to' books. Kids and kids are the same... best mates bond without the need for instruction. It just happens naturally, and works a treat.

Maybe we can learn a thing or two about relationships from dogs and kids.

JustinO'Shea said...

GARY poster:
Why should anyone assume that Jesus wasn't gay? He never married and had 12 best mates. Just thought I'd throw that into the ring.

As to relationships, my friend's dog died the other day. She was 14 and he's 15, so you can imagine how close they were. I got to thinking about kids and dogs, and how well they bond. No need for 'how to' books. Kids and kids are the same... best mates bond without the need for instruction. It just happens naturally, and works a treat.

Maybe we can learn a thing or two about relationships from dogs and kids.

JustinO'Shea said...

I do not know why Gary's comment did not post to the blog in the ordinary manner. I had to cut n paste it here. ;-)
----------------------
Yes, Gary, I suppose we can learn from dogs and kids about bonding.

My dog was 12 years old when he got very sick and had to be euthanized. We grew up together. . .and it broke my heart.

But, Gary, we DID need to learn. . together. Why would you assume that we have nothing to learn about living, loving, bonding. . .?
As babies we act as if we are the center of the universe and gradually as we learn and recognize that ARE others around who have a life separate from me and do not exist to fulfill my every need and whim. . .

It is said a dog has unconditional love for his mate [me, for example]. OK. But do I necessarily bring that same kind of 'puppy unconditional love' to a relationship with another human?

Just look around. We all need to learn and grow to expand beyond ourselves. Theologians call that
"original sin". . .we are not born perfect. . .we need to learn and often learning comes from others. . .how else do we un-learn the original selfishness?

Just added thoughts to yours. . .

justin

Jabacue said...

Justin, re your comment to Gary: I have come to realize and believe that we were born perfect. It is life's experiences and thoughts that influence us in negative ways. It is up to us to take control and regulate the 'input'.

Humans are the only animals that, through evolution,are conscious of self. This is a great thing to have but also something that can and does lead to lots of problems.....lots of unnecessary 'baggage'. What makes dogs so great is that they live 'in the moment'....constantly. Oh to know how to do that!

JustinO'Shea said...

Interesting ideas. . . do you think it is possible to learn how / to teach oneself how to live in the present moment.. . .to discipline oneself to assist living in the present?

Also I believe life experiences teach us very positive things about self, living, loving. . . Where else do they come from?

The word education comes from the Latin verb "educare" which means to draw forth, to draw out of self. . . which, to me says we need teachers/instructors. . .and I believe our parents are the prime teachers who initiate this process of "drawing out. . .e=ducare. . .and then all of the varying existential experiences, learning, growth and development.

This doesn't happen in a vacuum or by oneself. . . even a child in the legends brought up by The Wolves was taught by and shaped by them and his interaction with them/others. . . .

Aren't we social animals - to use those primal terms --? All animals grow in society.

Scientific studies have been done with babies. One study group was fed and provided with necessities.
The other group received the same to hich was added all the usual things like holding, cuddling, touch, talking to, etc.etc.

Don't you think there was a difference in the two groups?
Decidely. . .so much so it was never repeated in responsible, normal study. The bad effects were terrible on the negative/neglected group.

Might we say the potential to grow, to perfect lies within us all. . . .but these must be drawn out / educated, shaped and formed by interaction with others, our world, etc.

What do you think?

justin

Jabacue said...

Through the practice of meditation (and there are numerous ways to meditate) people have learned to live in the present. I learned that it is very difficult to do this....it takes a lot of daily practice. And if you manage to experience the 'present' for a few moments , you are doing well initially. I took lessons at the local Buddhist temple a few years ago. There were lots of Christians there too.....nuns, priests and practicing Roman Catholics, and people from every faith.
We were told that we should learn to fully experience every thing that we do....by focusing on what we are doing 100%.This is difficult because our mind will take over with the thinking process and start to bombard it with all sorts of unrelated stuff.

Anyway, why not look into a meditation class/lesson. You can still be a devoted Catholic....actually it may enhance your beliefs.

Gary Kelly said...

The present moment. What is that exactly? I'd always thought of eternity to be endless, with no middle. But a Florida friend sent me this quote which I thought was interesting because it divides eternity into two:

Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862), the American author well known for living for several years very simply in a self-built house on the edge of Walden Pond, wrote in his Walden (1854), in the chapter called 'Economy': "In any weather, at any hour of the day or night, I have been anxious to improve the nick of time, and notch it on my stick too; to stand on the meeting of two eternities, the past and future, which is precisely the present moment; to toe that line."

The meeting of two eternities. How's that for thinking outside the square? I love it. So there you have it... the definition of NOW... the present moment.

Anonymous said...

Gary, yes, there can be 'two eternites' …and they do meet, in an infinite number of 'present moments'.

If time is eternity is infinite, then if you pick an arbitrary point in time, there is an infinite stretch of past time before that point in time, plus an infinite stretch in future time beyond that point in time.

There can be no exact middle to eternity because there is no beginning and no end....but we can 'divide' it into an infinite past and an infinite present, either side of 'now', present time.

All a bit obvious, but fun to contemplate.


Justin wrote: "do you think it is possible to learn how / to teach oneself how to live in the present moment.. . .to discipline oneself to assist living in the present?"

Is it possible to regularly make a conscious effort to learn better from the past?
I think that is what you are asking Justin?

We learn from the past naturally, we do it all the time. But we don't always do it consciously or deliberately.
Yes, I am certain, that with self discipline it is possible to develop our consciousness of the process and get more from it…buy making a sustained effort

Hell, if we didn’t learn from the past it would mean we would have to be totally reactive, we'd be constantly puzzled and busy, working things out as they fell upon us and not able to refer to past experiences and learned reactions and making way more errors of judgment….like the proverbial goldfish eh!

Me? No, I don’t have that self discipline. Never had it, and I think I get by well enough.


Or, Justin, do you mean teach yourself how to make better decisions and reactions in the present moment when something new crops up? To be able to better react and respond based on limited or no previous experience of the situation that presents itself at that point in time?

My answer to that would be yes, but it would still have to be based on tiny fragments of what we've experienced in the past, no matter how tenuous....

Interesting, but I’ve got a coffee to make...lol...a nice brew….and I need to make a decision, do I re-read wot I just writ and see if it makes sense?.... or do I just let my confusion reign, for a laugh?

Hmm..no, coffee wins, have fun with this!
Chuckling to himself,

Greg in Adelaide

Gary Kelly said...

While we're discussing life's profundities, here's the real story of Adam and Eve. Funniest thing I've ever seen... but banned of course. All the good stuff is banned.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKAW96N-Vms&NR=1

Stew said...

I do think that it's possible to live in the present to a point. It is easy to learn from the past and apply what you have learned to your current decissions. However, we are always thinking of how our decissions today will effect our future. If you don't, the future might not be so bright.
While you are experiencing university now, the fact that you are going to university says that you are thinking about your future.

JustinO'Shea said...

All interesting comments and observations.

Here is how i see "living in the present moment. . .the NOW: doing what I am doing as consciously as I am able. . .at the moment; fully engaged; present; attentive; active; involved.

I think too that my mental attitude underlies my decision "to be fully alive."

As for meditation: I learned a type of meditation using a mantra, in high school.

justin

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