Week 3: Taking Care of Yourself

Welcome to the third installment of your "Partners In Life" 5-week e-program brought to you by The Gay Love Coach: Man 4 Man Coaching Services™.

You can best take care of yourself by being responsible for getting your own needs met.

In addition, you are not helping yourself, your partner or your relationship if you are so solicitous of your partner that they do not need to take responsibility for getting their needs met.

You can practice mutuality by asking your partner to cooperate in meeting your needs, and by responding cooperatively when your partner asks you.

Taking care of yourself means not mind-reading your partner or anticipating his or her needs, and not expecting your partner to mind-read or anticipate your needs.

Do not try to make life "OK" for anyone but yourself, and do not expect anyone to make life "OK" for you. Realize only you can make yourself happy.

In addition, taking care of yourself means making it a priority to maintain a balance in your life between your own needs, and the needs of your partner, children, employer, etc.

Relationships fail when a partner lets their needs, values, goals, and interests fall by the wayside, only to resent and/or regret it later.

Recommendations:

1. Write down your top goals and interests before you met your partner, and find ways to further them while in your relationship. 2. Design and practice your own "Daily Balance Practice;" something you do every day to help you stay centered, clear, balanced, and grounded. Examples include prayer, meditation, exercise, journaling, tai chi, yoga, taking a walk, etc. This only needs a few minutes a day, and can make all the difference in the world between being relaxed and centered for the day, or stressed and overwhelmed. 3. Make sure you're living your life to the fullest extent possible, full of purpose and passion! Maintaining a long-term relationship with your life partner is only possible when you balance attention and nurturance to the relationship and ensuring that you're living a life of meaning that's fulfilling and energizing for you as an individual as well. Find out how to discover your true life purpose and how to bring about more passion into your life by reading the book in the Recommended Reading section below that is co-authored by The Gay Love Coach, Brian Rzepczynski. 4. Read the article "Calming the Storm In Your Relationship" by Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach™, for tips on anger and conflict management in gay relationships by clicking here.

Recommended Reading:

A Guide to Getting It: Purpose& Passion, co-authored by Brian Rzepczynski, MSW, The Gay Love Coach™. It is available for purchase here.

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